Wine glasses clanking, warm hugs, and bright smiles all around as you gather with your friends and family. You’ve been working so hard lately, and finally in this moment of relaxation the silly grin on your face is a combination of both the present merriment and knowing that your effort at the office is finally starting to pay dividends. The winter air is freezing cold, but there is a hot inferno of passionate adrenaline pumping through your body. YOU DID IT! YOU HAVE ARRIVED! Day and night you committed, did not give up, sweated, sacrificed. You chose the road less travelled, most surely not the path of least resistance and in doing so arrived at a far more rewarding destination. You are PROUD! My goodness it feels good.

And then, a passing comment. A needling comment. A sharp needle, it stings.

“Wow you really caught some lucky breaks. More than anything the timing just worked out well for you”.

It was only luck?! All the embers of that fiery passion from the previous moment have sizzled away. The good mood gone, turned to a pile of ash. Is there any truth to that? Was it simply good-timing or luck? Maybe. Maybe it was. You worked hard, sure, but you’ve worked hard before and things haven’t always worked out in your favour, so there surely must have been some luck involved.

Feeling deflated in the moment, it’s probably best to just stay quiet for the now and keep your successes to yourself. At least until you have some answers to the questions now swirling around your mind. And besides, these people here all project an air of success about themselves. Astute personalities, well-groomed and educated. Your achievements probably pale in comparison. Best to stick to benign conversation topics; weather, food, wine, anything but yourself. Yourself… standing here in a dress that’s too short. Maybe it’s too long? Who knows anymore, should I have just worn pants? Bike shorts? What are the celebrities wearing these days? Who cares? Why am I thinking like this?

In this moment, a sad realization: if I just keep my head down it’s far less likely to get cut off.

Tall Poppy Syndrome is the jealous act of putting someone down because of their achievements. The etymology was actually coined right here in Australia, though across the globe there are many social customs that regard humility and conformity above success, for example the Nordic “Law of Jante” (a law in name only, more a societal custom). To grow tall is viewed as selfish, and particularly in Australia, the common custom is to be shamed for doing so. When it comes to celebrating achievement, there’s a balance between boastful arrogance and humility, though perhaps, I wonder, if we were to nurture and nourish others’ dreams, hopes and successes, we might each feel a little more self-respect and self-worth.

Because tall poppy syndrome is as Australian as a Vikta lawnmower cutting through a field of native dandelions (poppies aren’t native to Australia), you may not be able to change the tall-poppy-syndrome attitude of your fellow Australians. Instead, what if you were to tweak your own mindset just a little? Allow yourself a moment of confidence and refuse to try to please everybody all the time. Consider that if you are only willing to grow as high as the other poppies, you’ve got Tall Poppy Syndrome yourself - you’re just cutting yourself down.

Tomorrow, stand a little taller. You may not change everyone’s attitude, but you just might inspire a few other poppies to grow to your level.